In the history of mankind, we have never spent so much time and effort talking about love and human relationships. Nowadays, in our hypermodern society, the love affair is a subject that obsesses, even for those who do not practice it. As philosopher Zygmunt Bauman clarifies in his book Liquid Love: "The 'relationships' are now the theme of the moment and, ostensibly, the only game worth playing, despite its notorious risks." (Bauman,: 44). In just eight centuries of loving constructions, from Andreas Capellanus's Treatise on Tratado del amor cortés to Bruckner and Finkielkraut's The New Love Disorder, the reality of the human changed so much that its bonds and symbolic implications, like the love of a couple, mutated. Particularly in the idea of the search and not of the construction of the couple.
If with courtly love the idea of courting and falling in love is created as a cultural process that goes beyond ourselves, "for even greater reward will I give you, if you persevere" (De Rojas,: 73) Melibea assures Calixto's loving plea. Today, with Tínder and other digital applications, the complexity behind a link is based on the over abundance of possible partners, not the idea of love, much less the social construction.
Internet has reconstructed the idea of the search. If the "small world" experiment of the mathematician Stanley Milgram showed that humans were six degrees apart in 1967, in only fifty years they became three and a half thanks to social networks and the internet, the couple's possibilities became exponential .
Beyond the folly of taking into account the three thousand five hundred million women or men as a possible target - if so you would have to have a love appointment every day for 9,589 years to meet all possible partners - if you make a selection more precise, let's say that you take into account an average age, that they are single, the same sociocultural condition and that they share spaces, the possibilities go down to a thousand women, according to the mathematician Fernando Martín. With this, the mathematical probabilities of finding the ideal partner become 0.0001%, that is, it is easier to hit the lottery than to find absolute love.
In contrast, in a study by the English mathematician Peter Backus, taking as a case study women who shared what he wanted in life: single women living in London, with a degree, attractive and who believes that he can be attractive, it was reduced to 26. A still high number, but affordable
Now, the algorithm can work, but the brain becomes saturated with the choice. Howard Moskowitz, psychophysicist who came to the solution that when people have to choose between too many options, in their case food, people choose not to choose. By not knowing if the answer will be the best, the brain remains on the lookout. On this, the anxiety to think about the possibilities of running into these 26 women among the more than five million women who live in the London capital. You could think that the easiest way is to frequent places that are among the possible spaces that the other profile would also cover: a bar, a museum, a trendy restaurant, maybe a stadium or a concert. Let's change London for another big city, for example, Mexico City. In a mathematical calculation it is easy to find that magical number of women with whom you can have a parity, but how to do it in the Mexican capital where there are 115 museums, 3,600 clubs and bars, 35 restaurants, 129 theaters. How to know in which of these spaces will be one of the 26 women with whom you can create a couple?
Before the beloved was granted by destiny and the function of the lover was to conquer it, because "with light wings of love I crossed these walls, because there is no stone near able to stop love, and what love can do, that love dares to try "(Shakespeare, 19999: 302).
If the man of the West feels veneration before love and its cultural process, what does this love mutation entail? Now, in Tínder there are more than forty million possible couples. It stopped construction exponentially. If in the middle of the last century Erich Fromm assured that the search goes beyond the other as an autonomous being and as a being, to be a loving recipient. The social transformation of hypermodernity went from love as an achievement to obsession.